Comfort people should be like this

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Sad when friends, many people recommend either reason, "don't cry" a little strong. Or help analyze problems, told him "you should do", others will criticize each other: "I give you said ..."

Comfort also must tell the psychological techniques, to each other's mental activity, the most intimate comfort.

To listen to each other's woes

As a life experience, family background, education, and so different, each for a different understanding of pain.

Therefore, when trying to comfort a person, it is first necessary to understand his frustration.

Comfort, listen to that important.

A depressed heart needs a gentle listening ear, rather than logical sense, coherent head. Listen with our ears and heart to hear each other's sound, don't ask things that cause and effect, and do not rush to judgement, to give each other space, so that he can freely express their feelings.

Listen, share their feelings, they will be aware of our inner fluctuations.

If our experiences to "sad at his sadness, happiness at his happiness", comfort, this is to give him the best help.

To accept each other's world

Comfort one of the biggest obstacles that often lie in comfort seekers can't understand, realize and acknowledge the parties think of distress.

People tend to be upset about the limitations in the definition of self can understand range, once exceeded the scope is "hard" it was unreasonable. As someone mentioned "bitter", therefore, comfort, easy listening of resistance, and can't wait to put forward their views. Therefore, comfort would need to abandon their deep-rooted idea, recognize their own bias, and truly stand on each other's point of view of the problems faced by him.

Psychologists say "your own world, to accept other people of the world".

Best comfort, is to put aside your own, go to the other side of the inner world, his eyes to see his face and not blindly judged.

To explore the other side of the road

Comfort seekers often feel that they have an obligation to propose solutions for each other.

Everyone knows that each person afflicted by pain, before seeking comfort, almost all have been a series of ongoing attempts, constantly searching for the experience of failure. Therefore, we need to do is to explore the other side of the road, about their experience of the struggle to be heard, to be understood, accepted, and told him he had done enough, enough good, this is a kind of comfort.

Psychological experts remind comfort, an important concept: "the comfort is not the same as treatment.

The treatment is to make people change, the change to severance of distress; and comfort is certainly its bitter, not trying to make the attempt to break their distress. "In fact, in the comfort of people in the process, by providing any solutions are likely to be defective or not applicable, so that each other once again disappointed, so without intervention, not to the ideas, listen, understand, and agree with it, is the comfort of the highest principle.

In addition, with each other along for the ride is also a kind of comfort.

Each other in your company, find a safe, warm, so talk to pain, telling his anguish, regret, remorse, say all you want to say, when he has finished after the storm, my heart began to calm down, calm in the face of their own experience, he will be truly grateful for your company, it is by its own strength came.

(Practice editing: Cheng Yu-Shan)