Man in the face of marriage will produce what kind of mental

Marriage never existed in a wide variety of issues.

Whether domestic or foreign, divorce cases has increased over the years, this is a well known fact. Even a lifetime efforts to maintain the status quo of couples, the marriage may also be affected by the next generation of rebuke: as a parent, your marriage is a sham. You betray myself deceives us.

Have the data show that several major cities in China's marriage researchers 601 couple were investigated, when they were asked: "do you love your wife?"

Only 11 percent of people without thinking to answer: "Yes."

From the male point of view, the worrying situation of the crux of the problem is?

In a number of marriage and marriage, the young man that emotion, he married the day they started going downhill.

He was nervous and trembling, anxiety and confusion, they tried to escape reality. Some people will tell you should be the groom young man, a new marriage of fear is normal and to be prepared, we must strive to overcome it. Family and friends to his inner thoughts activities a vague enough to lead to the interpretation of his guilt, such as: "are you afraid of approaching women and obligations. "" You do not want to arouse life burden. "" You're not willing to give up your personal freedom. "" You, this is not a sign of maturity. "And so on. Then they will be comforted him and said, you will overcome the fear of mental confusion, and must be overcome in the process, and slowly mature.

That led to the word "fear of guilt", often used to explain a man's conflict and negative emotions.

It is very much like a flag or battle cries, successfully inspire men bravely to accept tough test, overcome difficulties and to show their strength. He thus inhibiting their secret real emotional needs. Since then, when he sought to overcome fear and inconsistent with the strong reaction of psychological cause, he has nothing, but to leave a marriage breakdown.

When the marriage is on the verge of collapse, has actually been to the irreversible stage, these suppressed resentment, like the flood gates of General burst feelings.

Only this time, he remembered the old emotions, realized that he had produced the real cause resentment. But before that, he spent most of the energy of the repressed, overcome their discontent and rationalize it.

Just like his wedding day reset their inner feelings call regardless of same, in order to maintain the marriage, he would also like to continue to ignore their true feelings.

When he was upset, he will tolerate the past. When he had no sexual desire, he may fear, begin to doubt her own sexual function is normal, and at the same time, trying to overcome their "widow wants."

Sometimes does not want to go home after work, but in order to make the responsibility of the husband, had reluctantly back, even when he arrived home filled with the spirit of the community, the weariness, quiet.

During the day, even if he were filled with reluctance, but from the Office to call his wife because he felt his wife have this requirement.

Weekend, he was cooking, run errands as a busboy, patch, and then completely passively sitting in front of the TV, try to play a good husband and father.

When he and his wife, exchanges with other couples, he also had to play a hospitable host or popular guests, when in fact he had no interest in.

Therefore, his many acts are insincere, simply to satisfy him overcome, negative and negative emotional needs wenshi, which makes marriage inevitably become a heavy burden, which finally cracked.

Only at that time, he didn't let long suppressed anger toward it.

However, before that, he was inclined to self hatred, self-destructive, hate themselves did not achieve the desired end, the weak and incompetent, or did not like his imagination, and his wife got better.

Therefore, some self-destructive, such as: "you are a selfish creature!" Or "you don't know how to love!" As well as the various accused, like all nails, will he firmly nailed on the cross in marriage.

Men begins in the new inner resistance is not naive and irresponsible, but a useful inner impulses.

This young man is undoubtedly true that men in their twenties are parents urged to marry, this is our social life in one of the greatest tragedies in men — he's feeling is far from being fully developed, the youth had spent in a hurry, vocational and ideas have not been sufficient education, nor does it obtain more reliable economic footing. Early marriage will suppress the emotional and economic burden to his head, hands and feet bound him, make him into a mere only subsistence lifestyle, physical and mental health have been abused.

From the early state of mind of men, their marriage does not seem to be a good basis to make them get great satisfaction.

In fact, early in the men's mental condition, to achieve a happy marriage, is almost impossible. For the boy, who claimed he was very aggressive, creation, challenge, the struggle, the spirit of exploration. But the girl you can from the doll, House, playing for fun and informative. Generally speaking, men rarely take part in such activities. Regardless of gender, these differences of early psychological condition is good or bad, after all, reflects the actual male marriage psychology.

Specifically, it is precisely because of these between the sexes, the mental condition of men often feel playing the role of mature couples.

He frequently to adapt to the circumstances, the purpose of achieving top period, but also with his early education. Had to change their natural pace of life, and force yourself into another person.

As a result, he

Always have a sense of oppression, looted. But in the eyes of others, but has always been seen as a standard for men. People often hear the woman complaining about their marriage is oppressed by a party, this is clearly not entirely correct. No doubt she would also be bound by the marriage relationship, but a man's heart more vulnerable to injury, because men emotionally on marriage also lacks adequate preparation, more vulnerable to denial and suppression of your own personality. In trying to maintain that sort of marriage at the same time, he and true self more and more distant.

(Edit: Europe Shumin internships)